Rating: General Audiences
Archive Warnings: No Archive Warnings
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Relationship: Aaron Hotchner/ Spencer Reid
Characters: Aaron Hotchner, Spencer Reid
Additional Tags: Fluff and Angst, Songfic, Song Lyrics
In a hurry to leave to protect his son, so many things had to be done. Names to be changed, friends left behind. Hopes and dreams surrendered. The future that was planned, tossed aside for the hope of just being alive for a future. Jack deserved a life. Haley had hers taken away. There was no way that Aaron would allow anyone, anything, to take Jack’s. He had already seen too much in his short 10 years. Too many fears, too many tears, for a boy. In protecting the world from monsters, one too many had crept into his own home. No matter how much, he wanted to look back, Aaron couldn’t this time. No goodbyes, no hugs, no sorries, off he and Jack went dropping everything behind.
Staring out the window, listening to some classical music playing, Spencer drank his red wine. The darkening road before him, he saw the stars start to illuminate the night. He sat in the little alcove bench seat that Aaron had put in. The two of them would sit across from each other feet touching. Spend time talking or not talking depending on the mood that night, the case that had finished, what they needed, maybe just looking at each other and appreciating what they had. They could look out over the snow in the winter, the flowers in the spring. He could turn and scoot between Aaron’s legs and lean back against his chest, on nights he needed to be held. Tossing his head back against the wall, Spencer closed his eyes. Just letting the music flow over him.
Somewhere out there, in another window, in another city, sitting on another alcove bench, Aaron sipped on his beer. He looked out to his right. The shadows that the trees were starting to cast brought an eerie tint of darkness and foreboding to the coming night. What is hiding in the dark areas? What is lurking waiting for him? Is it safe on down the road for Jack? With the hope of the sun setting is there anything in the night for him? Pulling a long gulp, Aaron wiggled his toes. His heart aching for another pair of feet to be on the other side of them. He ran the wet bottle down the side of his neck. Imagining that it was someone’s cool lips, he closed his eyes for a moment as a tear slid down his cheek. Looking out again, he wished that he had gotten a chance to say good-bye. An opportunity to touch, kiss, explain – not that Spencer didn’t understand, Aaron knew he did, all his heart wanted was to make sure that Spencer knew he was loved and thought of. “I know how far away we are from each other. Distance doesn’t matter, I still love you. If things were different, if the future weren’t so dark, if it wasn’t about Jack…” He let the empty bottle fall to his side. His eyes focusing on a star that started to shine.
The CD stopped playing. The wine glass was empty. Spencer opened his eyes. His heart pulling him out into the starlit evening. He crossed his legs and turned towards the window. Searching the constellations, wondering which constellations Aaron was looking up at. Before his mind started calculating, which areas were viewing which planets and constellations at this time of year, Spencer stood. He walked to the closet and took out the keyboard. Placing on the shelf in the window, he started just fiddling, playing some notes. “Twinkle Twinkle Little star, how I wonder where you are, up above the world so high, like a diamond in the sky.” Spencer chuckled at his grand choice of what to play first. He thought of Jack and bedtime stories, as he randomly continued playing notes. His mind drifted back to sleepovers, forts in the living room, videos, they had watched together. Videos… what was that one, where the mouse got separated from his family. The sister is sitting and looking out at the night stars just like this in one part of the city… Spencer started to replay that night and that video trying to find the name. His fingers absentmindedly running over the keys playing a song.
Aaron watched the star for a bit. He started to hum. Since he had been home all the time now, he had been playing his guitar. He stood and got it from his room. Returning to the window, he noticed that the moon had risen. Strumming and thinking about Spencer out there somewhere, he started to play. “ Somewhere out there beneath the pale moonlight, Someone’s thinking of me and loving me tonight.”
“An American Tail!” That’s the video, Spencer remembered. Fivel the mouse is separated from his family on the way to America. The song is “Somewhere out there.” It dawns on him, that he is already playing. “And even though I know how very far apart we are, It helps to think we might be wishin’ on the same bright star.” He sings as he looks back at the same stars as a few moments ago. A smile starts to spread on his face, as he continues, “And when the night wind starts to sing a lonesome lullaby, It helps to think we’re sleeping underneath the same big sky.”
Aaron smiles, thinking of Spencer at his window at home looking out at the same star and the moon rising. He can see it perfectly in his mind. Spencer is there with his knees up, arms bent at the elbows, hands draped over the knees, those long fingers hanging down, his hazel eyes just lost in wonder, staring. Every so often, those fingers will move along with a thought or memory in Spencer’s mind. A soft smile will grace his face. Then for a moment, it will droop into a frown because Aaron isn’t there. Aaron’s heart sags, because he knows that pain is his fault. Closing his eyes for a moment, he finds the next line of the song, Mental he says “Spencer believe!” because…”Somewhere out there, if love can see us through, Then we’ll be together somewhere out there, Out where dreams come true.” ‘Someday, I promise,’ He whispers on the wind.
Spencer stands and faces the window. The moonlight drifting in and over him. He wraps his arms around himself, in a hug. “And even though I know how very far apart we are, It helps to think we might be wishin’ on the same bright star,” He sings as he sways. Closing his eyes, he can feel Aaron’s arms around him. It is almost like he is here across the miles, dancing with him. Spencer reaches one arm up, as though Aaron were spinning him around. “And when the night wind starts to sing a lonesome lullaby, It helps to think we’re sleeping underneath the same big sky.” Spencer puts his hand to his lips and blows a kiss out the window towards the stars. “I love you, Aaron Hotchner. Give one to Jack for me too.” Because, I know that “Somewhere out there, if love can see us through, Then we’ll be together somewhere out there, Out where dreams come true.” Spinning back around, he walks to the bedroom and to sleep.
Aaron takes one last look at the star. Giving a smile and wink at it, he leans his guitar against the window. “See you tomorrow night, so that we can be together again for a little while, Spencer. I was so tired of being alone. I am glad that I found you tonight.” Turning off the lights, he heads to bed. Thinking to himself as he goes, a little rhyme from a long time ago. Star light, star bright, first star I see tonight, I wish I may, I wish I might, have the wish, I wish tonight.